My daughter with autism keeps flapping her arms. How do I make her stop?

Answer by Amanda S. Glover:

My autistic daughter keeps flapping her arms. How do I make her stop?

She keeps getting weird looks in public but she still won’t stop. What can I do?

That depends.

Do you care more about your daughter’s ability to self regulate, feel calm and express herself OR how strangers perceive her and by extension, you?

IF you care more about your daughter you can let it go. Of course suggesting/teaching less obvious stims is a possibility, but in the end it needs to be her decision.

IF you care more about strangers, hold her arms down, teach her “quiet hands,” and shame her about her behavior. It likely won’t help in the long run but it’ll work in the short term and help her along in growing into an unhappy adult with trust issues. Extra bonus: She’ll also probably resent you.

Graphic reads: “Stimming is not a meaningless behavior. In fact, autistic people say stims serve many beneficial functions providing 1. emotional self regulation 2. sensory stimulation, and 3) expression.”

My daughter with autism keeps flapping her arms. How do I make her stop?

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